A day to remember someone special

Show notes (summary)

Losing someone close to you is never easy. However, when people come together to celebrate their life and remember them fondly it can help to ease some of the pain. Last year, the village hall in Croft-on-Tees became the centre-point of an event to remember a much loved member of their community who had sadly passed away far too early in life. One of the group who brought the entire village together was Richard Coates, who tells the sad but inspirational story of what happened.

Transcript: Season 2 / Episode 19

Johnny Thomson 00:01
Losing someone close to you, whether family, friend, or someone dear to your community, is never easy. But when people come together to celebrate their life and remember them fondly, it often helps to ease some of the pain. Hi everyone, I’m Johnny Thomson and welcome once again to The Village Halls Podcast sponsored by Allied Westminster, the UK’s largest specialist provider of village hall insurance and the home of VillageGuard. Now last year, the village hall in Croft-on-Tees in North Yorkshire became the centre-point of an event that no one had foreseen or would really have wanted to have happened in the first place. It was an event to remember a much loved member of their community, Jonny Preston, who had sadly passed away far too early in life. A group of Johnny’s friends wanted to provide a fitting tribute and today I’m joined by one of that group, Richard Coates, who is going to tell us the story of what happened to Jonny and how they turned his passing into a day of contribution and remembrance. Hi Richard, thank you so much for joining me today.

Richard Coates 01:12
Hi, pleasure to be here.

Johnny Thomson 01:13
Now Richard, before we get on to talking about Jonny and what happened there in Croft last year, tell me a little bit about your village and the local community?

Richard Coates 01:24
Croft-on-Tees, a small village just outside of Darlington. I moved here when I was ten, and then after university I just lived in Darlington. But then I had the opportunity to move back into my childhood home, because my mam and dad wanted to downsize within the village. So that was 15 years ago and like my mam and dad I have become very much involved in the village hall. I’m a committee member and like many village halls, it plays a critical role in community life, providing a safe place for classes and parties and events and everything else in between.

Johnny Thomson 02:09
See you’re following in family footsteps in many respects with the involvement with the community there, yeah?

Richard Coates 02:13
Yeah. I really couldn’t avoid it!

Johnny Thomson 02:16
I like it. Brilliant. And Jonny, Jonny Preston, Richard, a great friend of yours and a few other local lads I gather. And a pivotal figure in community life there as well. What was he like Richard?

Richard Coates 02:35
Yeah, he was I guess for anyone who lives in the village, you always have characters that everyone knows and Jonny was certainly that in Croft. He was always happy to talk to anyone about anything and he was particularly in his element when he was the centre of attention. So, as an example, when we had a pantomime in the village and he was picked out to go up on stage, I don’t think he was embarrassed by it. In fact, I think he absolutely loved it. However, his daughter, I’m pretty sure she was mortified by the whole event.

Johnny Thomson 03:15
He wasn’t the dame was he?

Richard Coates 03:16
No, but I think if he’d had the option he would have volunteered for that as well.

Johnny Thomson 03:22
He would have taken it, fantastic. And did he help people locally and things like that as well? Was he that kind of character?

Richard Coates 03:28
Yeah, any village events he was always there. He would offer to set up or tidy up or do anything during the event. He was just integral to village life really. And with with several men in the village, you know, we did a lot of activities together. So he participated in walking in The Lakes, running, cycling, squash. He did tough-mudders with some of the some of the guys in the village.

Johnny Thomson 03:58
He did what?

Richard Coates 03:59
Tough-mudders.

Johnny Thomson 04:01
What’s that?

Richard Coates 04:02
So, it’s like it’s a run, but then with with obstacle courses in the in the middle, whether it be going into a skip filled with cold water or climbing a rope ladder or… Not pleasant. It’s not something that I volunteered for, but he did several of them.

Johnny Thomson 04:23
So he was up for anything basically?

Richard Coates 04:24
Absolutely.

Johnny Thomson 04:25
Is what you were saying, yeah, and one of the boys, one of your boys as well. And you went away on a few trips together over the years as well, didn’t you?

Richard Coates 04:34
Yes, yes. So we had several trips to Germany. One of the group is German, which helps. And so we had the cultural trips to Germany around the back end of September, October time, but they also usually involved hiking up the nearest mountain at some point, usually with Jonny being miles ahead of the rest of us who we’re struggling, but he used to go up with ease.

Johnny Thomson 05:04
Fantastic. A cultural trip to Germany around about October and a certain ‘Fest’, perhaps may have played a part in that I wonder?

Richard Coates 05:12
No, I don’t know what you’re talking about!

Johnny Thomson 05:17
They are the lips that are sealed, of a British man. Always good, I’m very proud of you Richard, well done. No stories to share then?

Richard Coates 05:26
No!

Johnny Thomson 05:28
Brilliant. And yeah, tragically Jonny passed away though didn’t he last year, at just 46 years of age?What happened Richard?

Richard Coates 05:39
So, last year, earlier in the year, he went to get checked out and they found quite a large tumour on the brain, which was removed. And we thought he came out of it and we hoped and thought he was on the men, but yeah, sadly only a year ago last October he passed. And although it was inevitable towards the end, it was it was still a massive shock and something we’re still coming to terms with almost a year old really?

Johnny Thomson 06:18
Yeah, of course, of course. And he’s quite a fit guy as you’ve already alluded to as well, wasn’t he Richard? He liked running in particular I understand. In fact that was, it was a running wasn’t it that gave you and your friends the idea for the event that you subsequently organised to remember Jonny to celebrate his life, yeah?

Richard Coates 06:39
So when, at the start of this year, so a couple of months after he passed, we met as a group in the village on what would have been his birthday. And the conversation came around to what would be a fitting tribute to celebrate Johnny’s life, and at the same time, raise some money for the brain tumour charity as well. And it was, it was Jurg, our village resident German, who made the suggestion to do something close to home within the village and utilise the, we’ve got a circular river walk around the village. So that’s where the conversation started. But we wanted something a bit bigger, a bit different to just a fun run, hence the 24 hour endurance element was conceived.

Johnny Thomson 07:28
And that became known as the Jog for Jonny, yeah?

Richard Coates 07:31
And that yeah, that’s what it that’s what it was coined as.

Johnny Thomson 07:34
Yeah and the village hall I understand also became the centre, the focal point.

Richard Coates 07:40
Yeah, the village hall was always going to be the epicentre for any activity that took place over the duration of the event. Because it is a massive part in community life, but also the only venue big enough to accommodate what we we’re planning in terms of managing the runners and giving out medals and running tombolas and raffles and drinks and food and, and everything else.

Johnny Thomson 08:08
Yeah, it’s a fairly new facility as well isn’t it? It was just built around three years ago, is that right?

Richard Coates 08:12
Yes. So we had the previous village hall, which was several years past its sell by date and we managed to get some funding to have a new village hall built. And that was maybe four or five months before COVID hit. So we had a limited time to utilise the facility. And so it’s use, this this wonderful brand new building was limited until the start of this year really?

Johnny Thomson 08:44
Yeah, so how did the Jog for Jonny day go Richard? I hope the weather held up for a start.

Richard Coates 08:51
Well we were really fortunate with the weather. The problem was, although we’d advertised it and put it out there on Facebook and told people about it, we just didn’t know what volumes were going to turn up. I mean, we, I’d had an inkling because I’d asked for donations for raffle and tombola prizes and we were we were inundated, so I got a sense that it was going to be a good turnout. But we were really blown away by the volume of people that turned out and the generosity of people on the day. It really was quite quite emotional for those involved, either his close friends and his family as well.

Johnny Thomson 09:41
So I mean, it sounds like the most most of the people in the village made an appearance, yeah?

Richard Coates 09:47
Yeah, I would say so. It was, you know, and if they weren’t able they donated to a prize, or they sponsored on the go funding page. And then there were football teams that his sons were involved in and they turned up on mass. His friends that he went running and jogging with. So there were different groups of people, you know, and it’s always nice when you get people from outside the village come and get involved in as well. Because the weather was, you know, right until the last lap I think we had we had some rain. And for the guys who’ve been running, I think they were probably quite grateful for that.

Johnny Thomson 10:29
Welcome relief.

Richard Coates 10:30
Yeah. But it always helps if it’s, if it’s a nice day.

Johnny Thomson 10:34
And you said it was raising funds for a brain tumour charity as well. How much did you do raise?

Richard Coates 10:41
From all the events and the donations we’ve had we raised just over £7,600 which far exceeded any estimations we had when we first instigated the idea. So we were blown away by that.

Johnny Thomson 10:55
Yes, for a single local village event that’s… as everybody who’s listening out there will know that have run these things will know that’s a fantastic total. So well done. Well done, guys. And I guess it was, you mentioned emotional day, I guess it was a day of real mixed emotions, yeah?

Richard Coates 11:13
Yeah, I mean, I think there were there were several elements. So, obviously what we were there to celebrate. But I think combined with that was the fact that we hadn’t had a village event on this scale, because of the restrictions of Covid. As a village, it was just amazing to come together. And then in one huge joint effort, despite the unfortunate circumstances of the occasion. And like I said, it was it was amazing to have his family, including his three children. And they participated in the first and the last lap. And for them to witness how much he meant to so many people.

Johnny Thomson 11:55
What do you think Jonny would have would have made if at all Richard?

Richard Coates 11:59
Well, I remember his Mum who I became very close to in the last month of his life. She said to me that he would have loved it. I think that she was spot on. I think it was just testament to how much he meant to so many people. So a very fitting tribute.

Johnny Thomson 12:22
Yeah. And I guess this has left you with a warm feeling about your community there and in Croft-on-Tees as well, yeah?

Richard Coates 12:31
Oh, absolutely. And I’ve said that in the post that I made after the event to thank people. I said how fortunate we are to have such a fantastic community in the village. And that it’s something we should never take for granted.

Johnny Thomson 12:47
Listen, thank you so much for coming on and telling us tell us the story of their of the Jog for Johnny event and fittingly with everything you’ve described Richard, I’m pleased to announce that Croft and your village hall there been nominated for our Wonderful Villages Inspirational Story award this year as well. So well done with that.

Richard Coates 13:11
Excellent, thanks.

Johnny Thomson 13:12
It’s a sad story of course, you know, and we’re all so sorry for yours and Jonny’s family loss. But we think you know, the way you’ve turned it into something where the entire community could remember your friend and raise important funds at the same time, you know, that really is truly inspirational.

Richard Coates 13:30
I know, it’s to be honest, it was a fantastic day for a fantastic man, to celebrate his life and what he meant to so many people.

Johnny Thomson 13:40
Yeah. Well, thanks again Richard. Please pass on, you know, my best wishes to your friends and to Jonny’s family as well, of course.

Richard Coates 13:51
Yeah. I will do.

Johnny Thomson 13:54
And again, sorry, sorry for your loss.

Richard Coates 13:56
Yeah, no, it’s it’s it helps to. It’s funny, it helps to talk about it, because it’s not something that you do talk about. I’m very much someone who would write something down. So I was writing things down and getting quite emotional about about that, because you sort of, it brings it it brings it all back, but…

Johnny Thomson 14:21
It’s difficult, but you know, it’s that positive side to it and element to it. And Jonny certainly sounds like he would have been the kind of character that would have wanted to be remembered that way, rather than everybody you know, being sad and down about it.

Richard Coates 14:36
Oh, absolutely, yeah.

Johnny Thomson 14:36
Yeah, yeah. And that’s where we must leave our latest episode. Keep submitting your entries to our Wonderful Villages Awards. There’s five awards all together, each with a prize of £1,000 for your local village, church or community hall. You can find more information about the Awards on our website. Many thanks also to our headline sponsor and specialist insurance provider, Allied Westminster, for making our podcast possible and whose services you can discover more about at villageguard.com. And to online booking system provider Hallmaster, who also sponsor our podcast and can be found at hallmaster.co.uk. You’ve been listening to The Village Halls podcast, a unique listening community for Britain’s village church and community halls, and anyone interested in the vital community services they provide. We’ll be back again soon with another episode, so please visit thevillagehallspodcast.com to subscribe, sign up for updates, link through to our social media pages and to find out more. But until the next time, goodbye for now.